calling?

this morning during praise & worship, i was singing "God is great, sing His praise, all the earth, all the heaven..."
i asked myself, did i sing it from my heart?
how easy it is to praise God during good time.
how hard it is to praise Him during stormy time.

today pastor tim preached bout letting Jesus into my boat, he can calm my raging sea.
He can turn darkness into daylight; stormy into stillness; futility into fruitfulness.

i went out to be prayed by pastor tim and every word he spoke, pierced into my heart.
indeed, wait upon the Lord, commit my dreams and plans unto Him and He will show me His Will and Plan in my life step by step... He is my comforter, my peace because He knew what i ve been through...

sometimes when we face trials, we tend to run away, disappear in front of people.
but i ve learnt to choose to embrace His love, and love from His ppl... His hands are always there ready to hold me and His ppl are also there to pull me up.
so, why run away?

last nite as pastor tim was sharing bout feeding the multitudes...
many of us responded and would want God to really use us...
he prophesied over me that...
"God will lead you to this place of darkness, very dark, with very little people, they are small, they are despised by many. but you will be a great blessing to this place, you will minister to them..."

oh wow. very little people... at first i tot they are physically very small... maybe 小矮人？very dark? meaning... those countries that are under spiritual bondage? or the skin of the ppl are dark? (india, africa? oh no)... but some of them think that might be those orang asli... or tribes... coz they are very little in terms of number... and this made me think of Akha Tribe in Northern Thailand!!!

i enjoy short term mission trips... but i never tot of becoming a full time missionary coz i prefer myself to have a clean room, clean bed and most importantly, a clean toilet. well... i guess i need to pray and seek God more about what He said. He will slowly reveal to me i believe...

His calling in my life...

and what will it be?